Love Still Makes a Family

This past week the Florida Legislature passed the Parental Rights in Education Bill.  Often referred to as the Don't Say Gay Bill, it is full of legal language and in sections very detailed.  But the section of the bill which has raised the most concern and the most conversation is Section 1001.42, Subsection 8, Paragraph C which is labeled STUDENT WELFARE.  It reads:  "Classroom instruction by school personnel or third parties on sexual orientation or gender identity may not occur in kindergarten through grade 3 or in a manner that is not age-appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students in accordance with state standards."

Nowhere does the bill say you "can't say gay"--but it does raise the question of what you can say.  What you may say.  If, for instance, a little boy in second grade has two lesbian mothers, and another child asks why he has two mommies and no daddy, what is a teacher supposed to say?  Is saying something as simple as, sometimes two women love each other and want to have a family, classroom instruction?  What if the teacher responds, you'll have to ask your parents, isn't that a form of instruction as well?  Doesn't it convey an unspoken message that somehow the little bay's family is so different we can't even talk about it?  Doesn't it convey to that child that his family is somehow subpar?  If I were a second-grade teacher with a child whose parent or parents is or are LGBTQ I would be at a loss as to how to make certain that child was made to feel fully welcomed in my classroom.  Just as they are. 

Public schools are supposed to be just that.  Schools open to the public.  The whole public.  Everyone is supposed to be welcome, regardless of who they or their parents are in terms of race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, ethnic background, and so on.  Perhaps the real, underlying debate here is over the purpose of public education.  Yes, part of the expectation is that students will learn how to read, write, work with numbers, and so on.  A democratic society relies on its citizens being literate.  But it also relies on their ability to work with others.  And to do that you must first be willing to accept the ways in which human beings can be and are different.  And that acceptance doesn't happen overnight, it begins in childhood.  Kindergarten doesn't need to feature full on biological discussions of sexual differences, but teachers do need to feel free to simply say love makes a family.