Come Hell or High Water--or Even Zombies

I took my 11 year old granddaughter to the movies the other night.  She's a charming little girl who has had a rather challenging year as her parents have gone through a separation, and she has moved from her old home--where she had lived for her entire life --to dividing her time between her parents' two different apartments.  That night she told me she missed the old house . . . but I think it goes deeper than that.  I think she misses the sense of stability that she once had.  But enough of the psychoanalyzing!  She seems to be weathering it all fairly well.

While we were making our way to the movie theater we talked about the upcoming holiday.  I asked her about her costume. 

"What are you going to be for Halloween?" 

"A Zombie prom queen," she said.  "Mommy is going to help make the costume."  And then she proceeded to tell me all about their plan for assembling the various elements of the outfit.  I was pleased to here my daughter-in-law was encouraging such creativity, even if I would have preferred to hear my granddaughter was going to be a firefighter or something a little less gruesome. 

But then I got to thinking about it a bit.  And I remembered something I once heard about Disney movies, back in the old days of "Snow White" and "Pinocchio" and other great animated classics.  Frequently, it seems folks would complain about the fact that Disney movies included evil characters and even acts of violence.  (Albeit, mild by today's standards!)  Especially the death of Bambi's mother.  You remember that scene?  Where a hunter kills the mother deer, leaving a grieving fawn behind?  At any rate, one time I heard someone defend such inclusions on a psychological basis. Such things, they said,  allow children to work out some of their fears, some of their concerns, in a fictional setting, making it easier to cope in the real world when they are confronted by the challenges of reality. 

It made sense to me back then--and it still does today.  Yes, it all can get carried too far--and today often is.  But children do need safe outlets for expressing the feelings we all experience of fear and anger and sadness.  I'd still prefer a firefighter or princess for my eleven year old granddaughter.  But maybe a zombie prom queen is just what she needs in this challenging year.  Whatever the case, I think she knows that no matter what changes she may face in life, she's got a grandfather who loves her come hell or high water--or even zombies!